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Are You Real When Speaking in Public?

“Dare to let the real you shine through” is the message by Teresa Tayag, Trainer, Speaker, Public Speaking Coach and blog author of Let the Real You Shine Through. I agree with Teresa that to be real when speaking in public is the biggest commitment you can make to yourself and to your audience. Most conventional guidance given to speakers is about performance, looking good, and putting on an act with all the dramatic pauses perfectly timed.

Should You Put on a Performance or Share Who You Really Are?

The advice about what to do, which is related to putting on a performance, can help if your purpose is to entertain. However, if you want to be heard, the best approach is to share who you really are and the passion that lies within you. You may think you need to stand a certain way, plan your gestures, vary your vocal tones, and rehearse, rehearse, rehearse. But to be who you are, you don’t have to rehearse. You just have to have the courage to let the real you shine through.

Your Power is in Your Fear

Ask yourself, what is the fear that stops you from being real? Is it that you won’t fit in? That your message will be rejected? Is it shame, humiliation, criticism?

Being real is risky, but if you sacrifice who you are in order to please others, you risk alienation from your own essential self.

And this is exactly where your power lies! The core of you is natural and your true strengths reside there. You might have disconnected from this internal source of brilliant energy for reasons that had to do with a sense of survival or wanting approval. You can now find your way back to this tremendous resource which is waiting to be tapped.

Dare to Be You

The next time you are going to speak in front of a group,

  1. Think about how you might stay present with your true self
  2. Identify and connect with a core strength
  3. Remind yourself that this is who you are
  4. Be daring and bring forth what is fresh and new from within you

Doreen’s Essential Speaking Tip:

If you hold yourself back from being real when you speak, write down the specific thoughts you are saying to yourself. My hunch is it has to do with fear of being judged. A first step would be to find a safe group such as a Speaking Circle where you can practice what it feels and sounds like to be real when you speak.

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